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Japanese romance vocabulary appears often in anime and manga. Real relationships vary, so use these expressions with attention to the person and situation.
This guide introduces expressions for affection, invitations, dates and relationships, along with a few cultural customs. No phrase guarantees a particular response.
Confessing Your Love in Japanese
告白（こくはく）, kokuhaku, means confessing one’s feelings. It can be a way to ask someone to begin a relationship, but it is not a requirement for every couple.
People of any gender may confess their feelings. 好き can express liking or romantic affection depending on context; 愛 expresses love. English “like” and “love” do not have one interchangeable Japanese equivalent. Here are common expressions:
Common Ways to Express Love/Like in Japanese
| 好きだ / 好きです | (suki da/suki desu) | I like you. |
| 大好きだ / 大好きです | (daisuki da / daisuki desu) | I like you (a lot). |
| 愛している | (aishiteiru) | I love you. |
愛している (aishite iru) expresses strong love and can sound intense in a new relationship. 好きです (suki desu) is a common way to express romantic interest. Usage varies by person and relationship.
Valentine’s Day and White Day
Valentine’s Day is February 14; White Day is March 14. They are associated with gift-giving customs in Japan, although participation and expectations vary.
A familiar Valentine’s custom is giving chocolate. 本命チョコ (honmei choko) is associated with romantic interest; 義理チョコ (giri choko) with social obligation. Friends may exchange 友チョコ (tomo choko), and some people buy chocolate for themselves. White Day is associated with return gifts. These are customs, not rules that everyone follows.
| バレンタイン | barentain | Valentine’s Day |
| チョコレート | chokorēto | chocolates |
| プレゼント | purezento | present |
| バラ | bara | rose |
| 花（はな） | hana | flowers |
| 花束（はなたば） | hanataba | bouquet |
| 手紙（てがみ） | tegami | letters |
| 彼氏（かれし） | kareshi | boyfriend |
| 彼女（かのじょ） | kanojo | girlfriend |
| 携帯番号（けいたいばんごう） | keitai bangou | cellphone number |
For example,
| バレンタインがまちどおしい！ | Barentain ga machidōshii! | I can’t wait for Valentine’s day! |
| バレンタインをいっしょに すごしてくれませんか？ | Barentain wo issho ni sugoshite kuremasen ka? | Would you spend Valentine’s Day with me? |
| かれはわたしにはなたばをプレゼントしてくれました | Kare wa watashi ni hanataba wo purezento shite kuremashita. | He presented me with a bouquet of flowers. |
| わたしはかれし (/かのじょ) がいます。 | Watashi wa kareshi (/kanojo) ga imasu. | I have a boyfriend (or girlfriend). |
| でんわばんごうきいてもいい？ | Denwa bangou kiite mo ii? | Can I get your number? |
Japanese Vocabulary and Phrases for Asking Someone Out
付き合う (tsukiau) can mean accompany someone, associate with someone or be in a romantic relationship. Context makes the meaning clear; whether a confession occurred does not determine its meaning automatically. Use an explicit invitation when you mean a particular outing.
| かえるまえにきっさてんにいくんだけど、つきあってくれませんか？ Kaeru mae ni kissaten ni ikun da kedo,tsukiatte kuremasen ka? |
I am going to the coffee shop before going home, would you like to come along (or hang out) with me? |
| すきです。わたしと つきあってください。 Suki desu. Watashi to tsukiatte kudasai. |
I like you. Will you go out with me? |
| こんどいっしょにどこかにあそびにいきませんか。 Kondo issho ni doko ka ni asobi ni ikimasen ka. |
Do you want to go out with me sometime? |
| デートにいこう。/ あそびにいこう。 Dēto ni ikou. / Asobi ni ikou. |
Let’s go on a date. / Let’s hang out. |
| Using でもどう (demo dou) – “How about…” | |
| かいものでもどう？ Kaimono demo dou? |
How about some shopping? |
| えいがでもどう？ Eiga demo dou? |
How about watching a movie? |
| コーヒーでもどう？ Kohi demo dou? |
How about (grabbing) some coffee? |
Date Places Vocabulary
| えいがかん | (eigakan) | cinema |
| どうぶつえん | (doubutsuen) | zoo |
| ゆうえんち | (yuuenchi) | amusement park |
| ・ディズニーランド | (Dizunīrando) | Disneyland |
| ・ディズニーシー | (Dizunīshī) | DisneySea |
| びじゅつかん | (bijutsukan) | museum |
| すいぞくかん | (suizokukan) | aquarium |
| こうえん | (kouen) | park |
| まつり | (matsuri) | festivals |
For example:
| いっしょにゆうえんちにでもいかない？ Issho ni yuuenchi ni demo ikanai? |
Would you like to go to an amusement park together? |
| こうえんにさんぽしにいかない？ Kouen ni sanpo shini ikanai? |
Would you like to stroll in the park? |
| すいぞくかんにあそびにいこうか？ Suizokukan ni asobi ni ikou ka? |
Should we hang out at an aquarium? |
Japanese Phrases to Use During a Date
Now that you have successfully asked someone out, you will want to know, compliment, impress, or entertain your date. Here are some of the must know phrases that you can use:
| すきなたべものはなんですか？ Suki na tabemono wa nan desu ka? |
What is your favorite food? |
| このレストランをどうおもいますか？ Kono resutoran o dō omoimasu ka? |
What do you think of this restaurant? |
| つぎはどこへいこうか？ Tsugi wa doko e ikou ka? |
Where should we go next? |
| てをつないでもいい？ Te wo tsunai de mo ii? |
Can I hold your hand? |
| キスしてもいい？ / キスしたい Kisu shite mo ii? / Kisu shitai |
Can I kiss you? / I want to kiss you. |
| あなたをいえまでおくります。 Anata wo ie made okurimasu. |
I will take you home. |
| きょうたのしかった (です)。 Kyou tanoshikatta desu. |
I had fun today. |
| いつまたあえますか。 Itsu mata aemasu ka. |
When can I see you again? |
How to Compliment your Date in Japanese
Do you want to earn plus points from your date? Try saying these words to compliment your date.
A common compliment pattern is (topic は) + adjective + ですね. For な-adjectives, use the stem before です: きれいですね, without な. The topic can be omitted when understood.
Adjectives:
| きれい（な） | kirei na | pretty |
| かわいい | kawaii | cute |
| カッコイイ | kakkoii | cool |
| ハンサム | hansamu | handsome |
| センスがいい | sensu ga ii | have good taste |
| じょうず | jouzu | good at |
| すてき | suteki | lovely |
| あたまがいい | atama ga ii | smart |
For example,
| ほんとうにセンスがいいですね。 Hontou ni sensu ga ii desu ne. |
You have really good taste. |
| はなしじょうずですね。 Hanashi jouzu desu ne. |
You are a great conversationalist. |
| かわいいですね。 Kawaii desu ne. |
You’re cute. |
Japanese Love Vocabulary: Beyond Dating
If things have become more serious, here are some phrases and sentences to help you take it to the next level:
| じんせいさいあいのひと Jinsei saiai no hito |
Love of my life |
| けっこんしてくれませんか。 Kekkon shite kuremasen ka. |
Will you marry me? |
| けっこんしよう。 Kekkon shiyou. |
Let’s get married! |
| けっこんしたい。 Kekkon shitai. |
I want to get married. |
| いっしょになろう。 Issho ni narou. |
Let’s be together. |
| だきしめたい。 Dakishimetai. |
I want to hold you. |
| とてもあいしています。 Totemo aishiteimasu. |
I love you so much. |
| えいえんにあいしています。 Eien ni aishiteimasu. |
I (will) love you forever. |
| あなたをこころのそこからあいしています。 Anata o kokoro no soko kara aishiteimasu. |
I love you with all my heart |
| あなたのことをいつもおもっています。 Anata no koto o itsumo omotte imasu. |
I always think of you. |
| あなたをいつもしあわせにします。 Anata wo itsumo shiawase ni shimasu. |
I will always make you happy. |
| えいえんにだいじにしたい。 Eien ni daiji ni shitai. |
I will treasure you forever. |
| いっしょにいるとあんしんします。 Issho ni iru to anshin shimasu. |
I feel safe whenever I’m with you. |
Other Useful Phrases
Ways of declining vary by person and situation. A polite or indirect reply can still be a refusal; do not assume everyone communicates the same way.
When turning down a date or telling someone you’re no longer interested, here are some phrases that you might hear, or can say.
| ごめんなさい。 Gomen nasai. |
I am sorry. |
| わたしにはつきあっているひと がいます。 Watashi ni wa tsukiatte iru hito ga imasu. |
I am seeing someone. |
| もうあえない。 Mou aenai. |
I can’t see you again. |
| ごめん、もうかれしがいます。 Gomen, mou kareshi ga imasu. |
Sorry, I already have a boyfriend. |
| きょうみがないです。 Kyoumi ga nai desu. |
I am not interested. |
Now that you have learned some Japanese love vocabulary and phrases, you can now understand and navigate the unique Japanese love confessing and dating culture. You can pick up more words by watching more anime and reality shows.
